I'll Make Myself A World (inspired by Saul Williams)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nktBsI0PYPs (Watch me)

When i was younger i used to be ashamed of the life that the ancestors gave to me. Used to be scared to bring friends home and let them see my living conditions. Now in retrospect i am stupefying grateful for everything that i had and still do endure. I sincerely believe that everything that has happened to me is for the betterment of my soul. But i must say that when i couldn't cope i made myself a world.


I would become entrenched and entrapped with music. specially Stevie Wonder, Donny Hathaway and Mary J. Blige. I would study their vocal tones and read the lyrics over and over again until i knew every word-this would keep me sane in my tremulous world. I would dream of life that didn't so closely resemble hell(American Beauty)lol. Through reading and studying about different countries struck by famine, poverty, war and genocide i quickly became grateful for my situation.

I was raised with my sisters ( we didn't get separated) , and i found strength and a love for myself. I couldn't be more appreciative for my life. The ultimate freedom is a mind free of fear and worry(Baayan Bakari)-and i am pleased to say that with much work and the help/guidance of the my earthly and spiritually ancestors, i am on my way to a better place.

But sometimes, i am tempted to return back to that dream world. To run down that rabbit hole as fast as i can when shit get hectic-but then i realize-i am exactly where i need to be. right place, right time, right state of mind.


Peace
trice

Today in black history

It's here Elizabeth....


Today the famous Red Foxx was born in 1922 in St. Louis. Foxx was a comedian with a popularly syndicated show: Sanford and Son(which my fathers love BTW)

He was notable in the classic films-All the Fine Young Cannibals (1960) Cotton Comes to Harlem (1970)
Norman... Is That You? (1976) Harlem Nights (1989)
Jamie foxx, martin Lawrence, Chris tucker, Chris rock all have mentioned that he was a major influence.
Rest in laughter Foxx!

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
Facts contributed by: http://www.yenoba.com/ http://www.wikipedia.com/

Today in Black history

1850 - The first African American woman to graduate from
college is Lucy Ann Stanton. She completes the two-year
ladies' course and receives the Bachelor of Literature
degree from Oberlin College in Ohio.

Big ups to: hellablack presents: Deep but not profound

This post is inspired by two things: Hellaback Presents: Deep but not profound blogspot page and Brandy's Afrodisiac album.


Most of the time i get on here and get real random. I say and post any and everything that comes to mind, maybe because i think no one will read or respond to it. Reading another blog post from a fellow writer (j.young) and listening to my ipod has put me in place of seriousness..hmm is that the right word...i guess. I want to be writer. books, poetry, short novels all the above-just by reading the eloquence of j.young's blog has compelled me to put my best writing foot forward and stop bs(ing). One day you'll see and or hear about me. trust that.
Peace
Trice

My heart-not whole heart just some of it

Repemdtion song

golden lady

Jesus childern of America

all i do

Superwoman

Yesterme, Yesteryou, Yesterday

black o.

A time to love

from the bottom of my heart

Ribbion in the sky You Are the Sunshine of My Life

Boogie On Reggae Woman

Sir Duke

Fulfillingness' First Finale Volume Two

make sure your sure Jungle fever

Higher Ground

Truth

this tat is so deep
can not wait til i get one
heart sankofa bird

S.Ma'at

inspired
by
this
picture
trice

i think this is beginning of water color experince!!!!
i think i might take this up
trice

How proud am i of myself?

Today was, what i like to call a pivotal day! A man ( no names need be posted) who i was ready to give my whole self, is now out of my like! I can to a conclusion that i am worth so much more than i was receiving! I deserve a man who will love, adore, cherish, commit, and support me through it all! A man who give me everything i need and sometimes what i want. And he will deserve all that is best in me, and i will give it him. long story short, i told the man that i cared for him immensely, but i care about me more. i want the best for myself! Nothing less. So i let him go, and i gained a Little bit of self-respect, self-assurance, and determination. I am a queen nothing less.




http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KpeNGpu9Lv4

She said...

Today i realized that what i wanted all this time is NOT what i need.
i know that this so cliche but seriously, i need to reevaluate my and push piece out that do not belong. people who only want what they need, always taking, never giving. I think the reason I'm so utterly mad is because the people who need to excluded are people who share the same chromosomes. people who gave me life, and also drain it out of me. Ex's who have long went on. Stupid ass, nonchalant,bitchass, euro centric mofo who never deserved my tears. Life, my life deserves more. what's important? not this shit that's for sure!

Hello good morning
Trice
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oM4wvq8MtHA

life after...

freedom from the process

The essence of me

the williamson sisters

Am i willing?

You have to be willing to be vulnerable. if you worship a man, then your faith can always be shaken. But if you worship ideals and concepts you will always be fine. Forget about the  "people". What did they stand for? Do you believe in it?


Focus on what's meaningful in your life..
Don't worry about how people see you..
 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8dK0iEzi1M

Free Write 9/18/09

S. Ma'at: Now Shontrice, How tired are we of you "saying" what your going to accomplish shit? How tired are are we fantasizing about writing a book? traveling? Of marrying Idris Alba?

 

Shontrice: I know! I know! it'sjust that my dreams fell better when they're in my head. In my head i can't fail. in my head i always win. I see my victory.

 

S.Ma'at: Okay but everything you want will always be in your head. Never to come into reality, is that what you want? To forever dream? Never do?

 

Shontrice: I will always dream. I always piece together what is i want in my mind before i act, playing out scenarios before i jump in into the fire. Don't you?

 

S. Ma'at: Well of course. But only for so long. the pain of not accomplishing makes me ache, and my eyes water; don't you fell the pain Shontrice?

 

Shontrice: Sometimes

 

S.Ma'at: Quit lying you fell it all the time. When you drop a class you KNOW you need to graduate, when you use you siblings as a crutch, when you stay in the apartment for days and turn down advances because of  fear of disappointment. Oh you fell it. That undescribable itch or twitch when you don't complete the goals you set out..that me trying to get your attention.

 

Shontrice: How can you be so sure?

 

S.Ma'at: I'm sure because you are sure. I know these things because you know these things.

 

Shontrice: What if i told you I'm afraid

 

S.Ma'at: I would say to you, so am i.  But that will never stop my progress, the creator built me to overcome obstacles. I am because you are, you are because i am


Shontrice: Who are you?


S.Ma'at: votre âme